This category contains the intention-setting ideas from the monthly newsletter.

5 Intention-setting Ideas for Luvin’ Up Your Brain

/in /by

June is Alzheimer’s and Brain Awareness Month

The Alzheimer’s Association® suggests people around the world wear Purple this month AND continue to exercise their brains to fight Alzheimer’s disease.  Research into the causes of cognitive decline, including the diagnosis of Alzheimer’s Disease, is ongoing because scientists still don’t fully understand the underlying process in most people.  Some of the latest research has revealed new evidence that a viral species, particularly the herpes viruses, may play a role in the biology of Alzheimer’s.  As with so many other human physical diseases, people worry about their risk of developing Alzheimer’s if there is a family history of the disease.  However, a family history doesn’t mean you will develop it too.

Several years ago, I began participating in an Alzheimer Prevention Trial (APT) online to support the ongoing efforts to figure out the underlying causes of this disease and, more recently, am participating in a study through UCI as well.  I’m hopeful that my participation will bring more light into the unknown, so we have more information to make choices to support the long-term health of our brains.

In the meantime, below are some ideas to reinforce the health of your brain, trusting that the human physical body is constantly working towards optimal functioning or homeostasis:

  1. Mental Health.   Research has shown that stress, anxiety and depression have a link to cognitive decline.  Therefore, if you experience these symptoms, consider letting someone know and ask for support.  One of the silver linings of the pandemic has been an increased awareness of how critical the health of our mental selves is and we are all susceptible to the traumatizing effects of our world.  Anxiety and depression are natural adaptive human responses to threats to our well being, so we are all in this together!
  2. Socialize.  Feeling isolated or having feelings of loneliness have also been linked to cognitive decline.  Research has shown that people with no social connections were 2.37 times more likely to experience cognitive decline when compared to people who had five to six connections.  So how might we increase our social circle?  Consider engaging in social activities that bring meaning or purpose into your life.  Perhaps connecting through your local community or neighborhood that organize such group activities.  Or volunteer at your favorite non-profit organization.
  3. Read.  Consider adding reading to your daily ‘To Do’ list.  You might even sign up for a course at your local community college or center, whether in-person or online.  Another option might be to start – or join – a book club!
  4. Lifestyle Changes.  Research has shown that there are several lifestyle changes that are options to protect and enhance our brain’s health.  Stopping smoking is one.  Exploring ways to include brain-healthy foods into your daily meals is another.  Daily physical activity is another as it increases blood flow to the brain.  If you ride a bicycle as part of your healthy life style routine, consider adding a helmet to your outfit, as head injuries from falls can raise your risk of cognitive decline.
  5. Learn something new. Research has shown that novelty is an important aspect of brain health.  So consider challenging yourself in new ways.  Some simply ideas to consider trying might be to listen to a different genre of music, take a different way to work or the store, learn a new skill, or rearrange the furniture in one of your rooms.  Novelty has been shown to enhance learning and memory, creativity and happiness, so why not give it a try!

5 Intention-setting Ideas for Sweeping Away What No Longer Serves

/in /by

What are you planting in the soil of your mind this spring?  Is the garden of your mind full of weeds?

Taking time to clean our homes after a long winter’s nap is an annual tradition that crosses many cultures, including Persian, Jewish, Japanese and Judeo-Christian among others.  This tradition of renewal has roots in neurochemistry as well as spirituality.  Our homes, though, may not be the only spaces that could use a good cleaning.

Our minds are very cluttered too, especially as we try to navigate a multi-tasking addicted world.  Our brains are not wired to do two things at once and, when we try, it simply means we are not giving our best to the tasks at hand.  Over time, multi-tasking sets us up for inevitable failure, which can over time pollute the soil of our minds.

Therefore, this spring, I would like to support your efforts to weed the garden of your mind.  Below are some ideas for reducing the toxins in the soil and creating space for your authentic self to bloom:

  1. Volunteer.  Volunteering for a cause you feel connected to can bring you a different perspective, supporting the both/and way of thinking.  We live in a dualistic either/or mental world that drives us to compare, compete, and separate, supporting disconnection and distress.  Ancient traditions guide us to see the world in a different, non-dualistic way that supports connection and inner peace.  Holding two seemingly different perspectives in the mind at the same time can act as great fertilizer for creating space for mental growth.  Volunteering can provide you with an opportunity to practice this non-dual thinking.  Consider volunteering and when you find yourself viewing aspects of the experience as contrary or conflictual, pose the question “Might both perspectives be true at the same time?”  If you can hold both in your mind at the same time, it expands the mind’s ability to declutter itself of constricting beliefs (aka weeds) and plant seeds of curiosity, acceptance and connection.
  2. Identify triggers.  When we experience uncomfortable sensations in the body and powerful emotions come up, it’s a sign that our natural adaptive fear response has been triggered for human survival.  It is mission critical to honor our survival responses to fear (i.e., freeze, fight, flight, faint/flop, fawn/friend) because they are immediate, automatic, and instinctual responses to potential life threatening experiences.  Accepting and understanding them as such goes a long way to releasing the sense of power they have over you.  Consider beginning the process by simply identifying your triggers.  When you notice that you have been triggered (and it won’t be in that immediate moment, give yourself some time to reflect after the body and mind reconnect), write down what was going on right before the body sensed the threat.  Then see if you might be able to identify how the body responded to the threat in that moment – did it freeze, did it run away and hide, or did your people pleasing part step forward?  No response is bad, remember it is automatic and adaptive to survival.  And your body might respond to different threats in different ways.  Can you also hear the voices in your head that say things to you like “You’ll never be good enough.” and/or “You’re not worthy of love.”?  If so, write those negative beliefs down, and congratulate yourself as you have just been able to identify the weeds that are strangling your garden from growth!  The more you are able to identify your triggers and the weeds that have grown in the toxic soil of fear, the less likely those parts of you will get behind the wheel of your car to drive your life.
  3. Set Boundaries. The inability to say no to others is a weed that grew from the fear response of fawn/friend and often is the mask of our people pleasing part.  Our people pleasing part comes from a place of wanting to be accepted by others to create a feeling of belonging.  Belonging is a normal human desire and protects us from outside threats.  Yet, the fear of not belonging drives our authentic self underground into that toxic soil of our minds.  Consider practicing saying no to others to say yes to yourself, starting small.  It will be important to recognize that the fear of disappointing the other person will be present, so I offer the mantra of “Say no, so others grow.” to support your efforts.  Remind yourself that the fear of disappointing will pass, creating space for both you and others to grow.  Then, after saying no, watch what unfolds afterwards.  Write about the space you created, noting how both you and the other person grew!
  4. Practice Gratitude.  The human brain develops in a way that starts with the survival responses first and then finishes with the growth of our ability to rationalize our experience.  So both the emotional and logical parts of our brain are intelligent!  Yet, the survival parts of the brain are the most powerful, as they are designed for the survival of the human race.  Therefore, we need to actively invite the engagement of the logical mind that is able to identify the positive aspects of awareness and understanding to balance the emotional fearful negative bias of the brain.  Consider practicing gratitude as a way to support that balance.  Research suggests that the human mind finds balance between 5 positive thoughts and 1 negative thought.  Perhaps start and end your day with identifying 5 things you are grateful for.  If you would like to really challenge the mind, take what you might have experienced as triggering that day and see if you can find something to be grateful for about that trigger!
  5. Explore Self Compassion.  As we are perhaps practicing the above intentions, remember we are turning over the toxic soil and weeding the garden of our minds.  In as much, we are working towards acceptance of all parts of ourself and how they served us.  Reminding ourselves during the journey that all of our sensations and emotions are normal, natural adaptive responses to the world in which we grew.  With that awareness and understanding, we are fertilizing the soil with empathy for our struggles that we have survived.  What we come to accept about ourselves is that we are both limited and limitless, flawed and flawless, skilled and unskilled beings.  As we begin to experience this acceptance of all parts of ourselves, we invite the flowers of self compassion to grow.  Offering ourselves the same compassion and loving kindness as we might offer others, supports our resiliency and connection, both with others and ourselves!

5 Intention-setting Ideas to Invite Engagement Back

/in /by

Mother Earth has begun to show signs of rebirth as the season of Spring is upon us!  It is the time of year where many of us start to feel more energized as we emerge from the darkness and slumber of winter.  However, if you are not having the same sense of energy and motivation bubbling up from the inside, it might be due to burnout.

It has been believed that burnout is caused by an imbalance in our work/life experiences and inadequate self-care.  Well, these circumstances can certainly aggravate and exacerbate the path of burnout, but new research indicates this phenomenon originates from a deeper well source.

If you think you might be experiencing the symptoms of burnout, or if you know someone that is struggling in this space, below are some intention setting ideas to begin to move into a healthier living and working space.

  1. Burnout or Moral Injury?  The World Health Organization (WHO) added a definition of burnout in the International Classification of Diseases, 10th Revision in 2013, well before the pandemic, and added a more detailed definition in the 11th revision in 2019.  The pandemic provided the perfect storm to advance the research on the underlying causes of burnout on the job, specifically the ‘double binds’ that create toxic environments ripe with opportunities to cause moral injuries.  Consider inviting your curious part to delve a bit deeper into learning more about this mental health pandemic.
  2. Do I Have It?  If you have been wondering if you might be experiencing the burnout symptoms of repeated moral injuries, perhaps take one of the online tests to assess yourself.  For those who work in a service industry, this test might be best.    For those who work in a non-service field, this test might be a better option.
  3. Where Is It?  Burnout is most often identified in the work environment.  However, it can also occur from life demands beyond our careers.  The pandemic did many things, including bringing to light the ‘double-binds’ organizations put their employees in, creating moral dilemmas and injuries.  The research that is emerging from this light is that burnout and moral injury are overlapping constructs.  This information is moving the responsibility for burnout away from the individual and onto organizations.  So, perhaps, to normalize and validate your personal experience with burnout at work, take a look at some of this research from eClinicalMedicine, and McKinsey Health Institute.
  4. Who’s Responsible for It?  An organization’s culture can either be healthy or toxic.  In 2019, prior to the pandemic, the Harvard Business Review published an article on shifting the responsibility for managing burnout away from the individual and towards the organization, encouraging employers to clean up the toxicity in the workplace.  If you hold an influential position within your company, or have a receptive boss, perhaps consider reading and then sharing this article to spread the word and advocating for change.
  5. What Can I Do?  Change starts with awareness and begins to gain momentum with a deeper understanding.  Treating the underlying cause of burnout – moral injury – starts with identifying the ‘double binds’ you are dealing with on a daily basis, whether at work or in your life.  The next step is to communicate those ‘double binds’ to others that might be in the same position and to those that are engaged in the creation of the environment.  Uniting with others that struggle with the same ‘double binds’ for support, camaraderie, mentorship, and activism is a vital part of creating change as well as opening lines of communication with those who have the power to enact change.  When we are able to effectively communicate the challenge (i.e., share the research) so others can truly feel the impact of the moral injury being created, we open up space for empathy.  It is in that space of empathy where mutual understanding and change blossom!.

5 Intention-setting Ideas to Celebrate National Reading Month

/in /by

The month of March was designated National Reading Month in honor of Dr. Seuss’ birthday.  The intention behind the designation was to encourage everyone of all ages to read every day.  Reading has been shown to provide health benefits such as improved cognitive function, increased memory and vocabulary, and decreased levels of stress.  It also enhances our ability to imagine, visualize, dream and manifest!

Below, I offer you the following ideas to consider to embrace reading this month:

  1. Library Trip.  Perhaps plan a trip to your local – or a new – library to explore what’s new.  Libraries celebrate this month by planning special fun activities to fuel the passion for reading.
  2. Share the Love. Consider donating any books you are would like to pass along to a homeless shelter, recovery center, or your local hospital.  Or perhaps you would prefer to swap books with your friends and neighbors, so setting up a neighborhood Little Free Library might be of interest.
  3. Reread.  Perhaps pick up one of your “old” time favorite books and reread it.  Pay attention to what seems familiar about why it is one of your favorites and notice what you might pick up new, that you didn’t necessarily remember from when you read it the first time.  Maybe reflect on how reading this book might have changed your life in some way!
  4. Attend a Book Reading.  Maybe your favorite local book store is planning a book reading and signing event.  Perhaps make a plan to attend it and bring a friend!
  5. Book Club.  Consider joining a book club this month.  Or, if you prefer, perhaps you start one of your own!  You can simply start with one other person – perhaps a neighbor, friend or family member – and decide on a book to start with.  You can set up a timeline that works best for you both, such as checking in weekly or giving yourself a month to finish the book.  Gathering to discuss what the book brought forward for you can be either virtually (yes, Zoom) or in-person.  If your commitment gains momentum and your motivation begins to grow, you might want to learn more about starting a book club through Penguin Random House.

5 Intention-setting Ideas for Celebrating Love Your Pet Day

/in /by

Benefits of Pet Ownership

National Love Your Pet Day is celebrated on February 20th.  Research continues to demonstrate the many health benefits of owning a pet.  A recent study showed dog owners were 30 minutes more active on a daily basis than people who don’t own a dog.

Will not only owning a pet perhaps increase your opportunities for exercise, it will create opportunities for creating a nurturing home environment by having someone to care for in addition to yourself.  The companionship they provide helps manage stress, anxiety, loneliness and depression.  If you own a pet that is at home outdoors, like a dog or a horse, engaging with them in this environment connects you – both with nature and other humans – supporting socialization and thus your sense of belonging in the world.  Regular walking and/or playing with your pet can also lower your blood pressure and lower your cholesterol levels.

So, for those of us who own a four-legged or feathered friend – or for those considering becoming an animal parent – below are some intention-setting ideas to consider to celebrate our pets:

  1. Massage.  Animals enjoy massages just as much as people.  So, if you have never massaged your pet before, consider offering one to your pet to deepen your connection.  I might suggest applying gentle pressure (think Swedish massage rather than deep tissue) to start and watch your pet’s facial responses.  Just like in our own bodies, massaging the back and neck areas will release tension, but don’t forget the head and face too.  If your pet companion is a bird or turtle, you can massage them too!
  2. Special Meal. Perhaps offering your pet a special meal to celebrate your connection.  If you feed your pet store bought food, perhaps consider preparing a meal from fresh foods instead.  Maybe cook a meal you both can eat together!  If you already feed your pet a raw diet, perhaps research a new recipe that might include a new vegetable to try.
  3. PLAY.  Just as humans have a basic need for fun, so do our animals.  Consider buying your pet companion a special toy and set aside some time to play with them.  Or you might consider running around with them instead.  Allow their playfulness to invite your inner child out to play and let loose!
  4. Donate to Pet Charities.  Consider making a donation to one of the following non-profit organizations dedicated to animals, perhaps in the name of your pet:  ASPCA, Best Friends Animal Society, The Humane Society, or World Wildlife Fund.
  5. Adopt.  Have you been considering adding another pet to your family, perhaps a second (or third) dog or cat to give your current pet some companionship?  Most domesticated animals are social beings and prefer not to be left alone.  In fact, many dogs and cats have been known to suffer from separation anxiety when their owners leave them alone for extended periods of time.  So perhaps take your pet shopping for a sibling to celebrate Love Your Pet Day this year!

5 Intention-setting Ideas for the New Year

/in /by

It’s time to release our attachment to new year resolutions!

Research out of the University of Scranton suggests that just 8% of the people who set New Year’s resolutions actually succeed in achieving those goals, thus leaving the majority of us feeling like failures.  I don’t know about you, but I don’t like feeling like a failure!

Some of the top resolutions people make include starting a new diet, losing weight, and saving money.  All of these goals imply a need for more self-discipline, which brings with it an implication that we are currently not doing good enough.  Coming from a place where we focus on giving up something to achieve an end result has the goal founded in avoidance, even in the name of self-improvement.  These behavior changes are rooted in fear, whether from our conditioned pasts or the unknown future.  Not fertile ground for real and lasting growth to occur!

Setting intentions, Sankalpa in Sanskrit, are made from the heart, not the mind, and focus on the growth of our souls.  So, if the reason we set resolutions at this time of year is to improve our lives in the new year, I offer you the following ideas for your new year intentions for consideration:

  1. Be Braver.  Taking risks, and perhaps even embracing failure as a natural part of our journey, will bring resilience and more happiness into your life.  Our culture that overstimulates the drive for perfection creates anxiety and a fear of failure, so that we are more likely to withdraw than pursue our dreams with passion.  Perhaps writing down one small risk you are ready to take in the new year and acknowledging that failure simply assists us in refining our approach.  After you invite your courageous part forward and take the risk, make sure to sit with the outcome and journal about what you learned from it!
  2. Be Kinder. When we support others, it makes us feel good – and it also makes the other person feel good too!  So, if we want to improve our lives in the new year, perhaps set the intention to do more acts of kindness.  When we model kindness, the seeds that get planted in others grow and spread.  What if you simply did one act of kindness a week next year?  Those acts might just grow a forest of kindness for everyone to enjoy!
  3. Be Curious.  Curiosity is a personality characteristic that is associated with success.  So when we can cultivate curiosity within ourselves, it will support us on our own growth journeys.  It creates an atmosphere that welcomes new things into our lives.  It supports us in embracing the inevitable changes that will come and actually makes us more excited for those changes!  So how do we actually exercise the curiosity muscle?  Consider identifying something that tends to bring up a reaction of judgment and craft some questions you might ask to gain a deeper understanding.  When you start to seek the answers to those questions, observe how judgment shifts and/or changes.
  4. Be Grateful.  Being grateful has been shown to support emotional wellness.  If you don’t already have a regular gratitude practice, consider setting the intention to try it out this year.  If you already have a regular practice, consider taking a new – perhaps more challenging – approach this year.  Try sitting with those life challenges (that we might label as bad, because they make us sad or mad) that we wish did not happen and find something about the challenge that you are grateful for.  What might help is remembering that all of life’s experiences have contributed to your mind, body and spiritual growth and advancement.  They have served you in some way, although it might not be clear to you in the moment how.  You might tap into curiosity here to help craft some questions to ask yourself such as “What painful experience(s) were the seeds to the parts of myself that I love?” and “What scary experience become a source of pride to you because you survived it and lived to tell the story, supporting the growth of your risk-taking, courageous part?”.
  5. Be Compassionate.  Do you want to be a more active, powerful participant in changing the world next year?  Consider practicing self compassion!  Much research has been done on how self compassion can neutralize those emotional charges within us that create disharmony.  And if we are in a place of disharmony, it is very difficult to bring harmony out into the world.  On the other hand, if we regularly use the tool that will bring comfort and peace to ourselves, then we can be more open to bringing that same comfort and peace to others.  Modeling such self compassionate behaviors stimulates the mirror neurons in the human brain, giving others permission to use this tool for themselves.  Compassion is contagious, so perhaps this is what you decide to spread around next year!

5 Intention-setting Ideas to Make Space

/in /by

This is the time of year that most people begin to formulate their New Year resolutions.  However, before we can add something to our lives, it is a good idea to get rid of something that no longer serves us to create space, and I’m not necessarily suggesting tangible, physical items, although the idea also applies to such an effort.

What I am suggesting during this last month of 2022 is to consider what might you release that drains your energy, so that you might invite in something that stokes your fire and energizes you to get up every morning.  Like the trees that shed their leaves in the winter to create space for the new life that will come in the spring, we too might need to shed something old to make room for the new.

Below are some intention-setting ideas to support you in creating some mental or emotional space in your mind-body, fertilizing the soil of creation for the new year.  It is my hope you will consider exploring one or more ideas and watch what blossoms in your garden!

  1. Take Stock.  Consider identifying and then writing about the biggest lesson you learned this year and what it has taught you.  Explore how the learnings have perhaps changed your way of being or your world view.  Have these learnings brought you more inner peace or anxiety?  If the lesson brought you anxiety, ask yourself why that might be and then identify how anxiety serves you.  Does it protect you from something?  Our emotions serve to inform us, if we simply give them time and space to express themselves.  Befriend your powerful emotions and then let them guide you when making decisions in the new year.  Once we befriend them, allow their expression and understand how they serve us, our emotions become tools in our tool kit for staying true to our authentic self, freeing up space for us to take up more space in the world!
  2. Gratitude. Perhaps writing down what and who you are grateful for in your life, and don’t forget to include yourself on this list!  Can you identify 3 aspects of yourself that you are grateful for and why?  Let the gratitude you feel be another guide when considering options in the new year.
  3. Support.  Although independence is an idealized ideal in our culture, most, if not all, of us accomplish life with the support of others.  Think about the people that you might have turned to for support this past year.  Who might have brought comfort, acceptance, and warmth to your heart?  Let their support remind you that you are not alone in this world, that humans are interdependent beings, and it is okay to not be okay and ask for help.  Let this sense of interconnectedness be one of your guides as you move into the new year as we collectively release the false belief that we must pull ourselves up from our own bootstraps when we are down.
  4. Giving.  Most of us are taught to give to others, whether it is our time, compassion, or care, which can make us feel good or resentful when all we do is give to others.  We are not taught to give to ourselves and instead are told we are being selfish if we ask for what it is we need or want.  Consider journaling about what you were taught about taking care of yourself, perhaps by the role models in your lives or your family culture, so you can weed your garden of any beliefs around self-care being selfish.  Self-care is mission critical and when we can provide it to ourselves (without guilt or justification), it creates space and allows us to move about our lives with more energy.  Can you identify ways you gave to yourself (in the name of self-care) this past year?  How were you able to do so?  Let the self-care steps you took this year lead you to more next year!
  5. Compassion.  As many of you have heard me say (more than once, I know), giving yourself compassion is the antidote to all that ails what being human entails.  Again, self compassion is not something taught to us, but it definitely is something we can learn if we understand that it will create space in our minds and bodies, freeing up our motivational energy to move forward with our dreams and aspirations in the new year.  Perhaps contemplate an experience from this past year when you experienced suffering (maybe you experienced a conflict with someone you care about, or did not succeed in something you wanted, or were physically ill).  Notice how you feel when you think of your suffering.  How does your heart feel?  Now ask yourself, “What did I need in that moment?”  Perhaps you needed comfort, soothing, or validation.  Try offering yourself what it is you needed, like you were offering it to a friend.  This takes practice, so click here if you are interested in listening to some guided self compassion meditations offered by Dr. Kristen Neff, a leading researcher on the transformative effects of self compassion.

As always, if you try any of these intention-setting ideas for holistic health, I would love to hear about the impact they might have had for you.  Please send me an email at linda@sanctuary4compassion.com to share!

5 Intention-setting Ideas to Honor a Rich and Diverse Culture!

/in /by

November is Native American Heritage Month!

In 1990, the President of the United States, George H. W. Bush, declared the month of November as National American Indian Heritage Month, thereafter commonly referred to as Native American Heritage Month to honor the traditions, languages, and stories and ensure the rich histories and contributions thrive with each new generation.  It recognizes the cultures of Native American, Alaska Native, Native Hawaiian and Island communities.

Below I have provided intention-setting ideas to consider celebrating Native American Heritage Month:

  1. Land.  One simple way to honor Native American Heritage Month is to learn more about the Nation that inhabited the land where you currently live.  Visit Native Land Digital to enter a zip code.  I currently reside on the land where the Tongva (“earth”) Nation settled.  The Tongva Nation wasn’t officially recognized by the state of California until 1994.
  2. Read. If you are an avid reader, perhaps consider reading a story about a Native American or one written by a Native American.  Some suggestions include:
    • Lakota Woman (Mary Brave Bird (Crow Dog)’s autobiographical history of the American Indian Movement. A civil rights must-read.)
    • The Heartbeat of Wounded Knee: Native America From 1890 to the Present (David Treuer. Chosen By Barack Obama as one of his favorite books of 2019.)
    • Firekeeper’s Daughter (Angeline Boulley. New York Times bestseller.)
  3. Visit.  If you prefer to learn through seeing more, perhaps a visit to a Native American museum or historical site might fit into your plans this month.
    • Hopewell Culture National Historical Park (Ohio)
    • Canyons of the Ancients National Monument (Colorado)
    • Ocmulgee National Monument (Georgia)
    • Gila Cliff Dwellings National Monument (New Mexico)
    • For a full list in the state of California, click here.
  4. Cook.  If your moving meditation is cooking, consider trying a Native American recipe.  The first step is to pick a geographical location and choose ingredients that naturally grow there.  Some starting points might include:
    • Cedar plank Salmon
    • Indian corn (or maize, from the Taíno name for the plant)
    • Three Sisters Succotash. “Three Sisters” refers to the main crops seen in many Native American nations throughout North America: corn, beans and squash.
    • Wojapi – Wojapi celebrates the wide variety of berries by bringing them together in a thick pudding.  The pudding is enjoyed by many tribes of the Great Plains including the Lakota, Cheyenne and Blackfoot tribes.
  5. Listen.  If you are a music connoisseur, perhaps listening to Native American music is more up your alley.  You can listen here!
  6. BONUS:  Watch on HULU:  Reservation Dogs!

As always, if you try any of these intention-setting ideas for holistic health, I would love to hear about the impact they might have had for you.  Please send me an email at linda@sanctuary4compassion.com to share!

5 Intention-setting Ideas to Support Others Navigating This Storm

/in /by

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month!

Two of my dear friends are currently navigating this more intimate, personal storm of breast cancer as I send this newsletter this month.  I know I am not alone.  With the prevalence of this disease, most likely everyone knows someone that has or is attempting to deal with this constant battle for life.

So to support these strong beyond measure warriors, below I have provided some intention-setting ideas for your consideration.  It is my hope you will consider exploring one or more of these ideas to go beyond awareness into taking action to support those living with this disease and trying to find a cure.

  1. Research.  You might consider educating yourself on the current developments in research (National Cancer Institute and BreastCancer.org) or donating to organizations that focus on metastatic breast cancer such as StandUp2Cancer and Breast Cancer Research Foundation.  .
  2. Speak Up.  Consider spreading the word about free mammograms, especially during the month of October.  Also, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) runs the National Breast and Cervical Cancer Early Detection Program that offers free or low-costs mammograms.
  3. Listen.  When cancer becomes a part of your life, it takes front and center on the stage.  However, that doesn’t mean it is the only show in town.  People need other people to simply be there to listen.  Some days they might want to talk about the impact of the disease or the treatments, yet more often they may want to talk about all of the other aspects of their lives, like their family, pets, their favorite TV show, their favorite vacation spot or restaurant, or they may ask you to talk about yourself and what is going on with you for the distraction.  Perhaps consider keeping this in mind when you connect with someone in the current throes of the battle.
  4. Donate.  Consider donating blankets, hats or scarves to a local hospital with a cancer wing or chemotherapy center.  If you are a passionate knitter or crochet artist, perhaps you make some hats or scarves from yarn remnants from other projects and donate them.  Simply contact the staff at these facilities to ask if they might accept such items and where to drop them off.
  5. Write.  Perhaps you write a card or letter to those going through one of the most frightening times of their lives and drop it off along with a scarf or hat, letting them know that they are thought of during this difficult time.  This simply act to show you care can be quite meaningful.

As always, if you try any of these intention-setting ideas for holistic health, I would love to hear about the impact they might have had for you.  Please send me an email at linda@sanctuary4compassion.com to share!

5 Intention-setting Ideas to Help Save Lives

/in /by
September is Suicide Prevention Awareness Month and September 10th is World Suicide Prevention Day.
(Reprint from September 2021)Suicide is not an easy topic to talk about and yet that is exactly what is needed in order to reduce the growing rate of this tragedy.  Conversations can make a difference when someone is thinking about suicide.

Did you know that suicide is now the 10th leading cause of death in the United States, that, according to the CDC, suicide rates have increased by more than 30% in half of the states since 1999, and that the youngest person to kill themselves was only 6 years old?

Many of us will notice changes in people around us and get the feeling that “something is not right”. You may not want to say anything for fear you won’t know what to say if they confirm your concerns. While these conversations can be very difficult and confronting, just one conversation can save someone’s life by preventing suicide.

You may not be sure what to do to help, whether you should take talk of suicide seriously, or if your intervention might make the situation worse. Taking action is always the best choice. Here’s what you need to know to start saving lives today:

  1. Know – and look – for the warning signs.  There are several warning signs of suicidal thoughts that you may hear or see, such as:  1)  Seemingly harmless comments such as “I wish I was never born”, “I wish I wasn’t here” and/or “I wish I was dead”; 2) Withdrawing from friends and family and/or wanting to be left alone; 3) Having dramatic mood swings; 4) Impulsive, aggressive and/or reckless behavior; 5) Obsessed with death, dying or violence; and 6) Increasing use of drugs or alcohol.  Additional warning signs that the person’s thoughts may be moving toward putting a plan into action include:  1) Giving away their possessions or getting their affairs in order when there is no other explanation for doing this; 2) Saying goodbye to friends and family as if they are not going to see them again; 3) Their mood shifts from a sense of despair to calm; and 4) Taking action to secure the tools needed to complete suicide, such as buying a gun or stockpiling prescription medications.  Take any and all signs of suicide seriously.  If someone tells you they are thinking of harming themselves or behaves in a way that suggests they may be thinking of suicide, don’t dismiss or ignore the situation as many people who have killed themselves had expressed the intention at some point.
  2. Know the risk factors.  According to NAMI, the following are risk factors for suicide:  1) Previous suicide in the family; 2) Personal history of trauma or abuse; 3) Prolonged stress; 4) Agitation and reduced sleep; 5) A recent loss or tragedy; 6) Isolation; 7) Substance use and intoxication; 8) A serious or chronic mental illness; 9) Access to firearms; 10) Gender (men are 4 times more likely to die from their attempt) and 11) Age (under 24 and over 65 are at a higher risk).
  3. Ask questions!  If you sense something is not right and you have noticed some of the warning signs, connect with the person by asking them some questions.  Be sensitive and direct and ask some of the following:  1) How are you managing with what is going on in your life?; 2) Do you ever feel like just giving up?; 3) Are you thinking about hurting yourself?; 4) Have you ever thought about suicide, or tried to harm yourself, before?.  If they tell you that they have or are currently having suicidal thoughts, continue to ask the following questions: 1) Have you thought about how and when you would do it? and 2) Do you currently have access to the weapons or things that can be used as weapons to harm yourself?  Please know that asking someone if they are experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings won’t push that person into doing something self-destructive. In fact, connecting with someone by starting the conversation and creating space for them to talk about their feelings may reduce the risk of acting on suicidal feelings.
  4. Know what to do.  If you become concerned that your friend or loved one may attempt suicide:  1) Stay calm (don’t fidget or pace) and don’t leave the person alone; 2) Ask what you can do to help, including “Can I help you call your therapist or psychiatrist?”; 3) If they ask for something, give it to them as long as the request is safe and reasonable; 4)  Don’t argue, threaten, or raise your voice, especially if they are experiencing hallucinations or delusions, instead be gentle and compassionate; 5) Don’t debate whether suicide is right or wrong; 6) Seek support by telling another family member or friend what is going on, by getting help from a trained professional, and/or encouraging them to call a suicide hotline number (i.e., in the U.S., National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-TALK (8255)).  Even if your friend or loved one may not be in crisis, it is important to still offer and provide support.  Let them know you are open to talking about what is on their mind.  When listening, demonstrate you are actively engaged in the conversation by providing positive reinforcement, reflecting their feelings and summarizing their thoughts.  Actively listening can help your loved one feel heard and validated.  Reassure your friend or loved one that you care and are concerned for their well-being and that they can lean on you for support.  If your friend or loved one has attempted suicide, call 911 or your local emergency number immediately or take them to nearest emergency room if you believe you can do so safely.  Try to determine if they have taken drugs or alcohol, whether they are under the influence or may have taken an overdose.  As soon as possible, tell a family member or a friend what is going on for additional support as you don’t need to try to handle the situation alone.
  5. Do more.  Start a dialogue now.  Consider watching “13 Reasons Why” and ask others if they have seen it, what they thought about it, and when (i.e., at what age) they might consider it appropriate to have a proactive conversation with their own children on the subject.  Consider helping out at a crisis center or volunteer with an organization that makes house calls to isolated individuals, such as single, house-bound seniors, such a Meals on Wheels.  Share images and graphics on social media to promote awareness and reduce stigma.  Remember that your engagement might just might help prevent suicide by letting others know that there are people that care and that there are other options available!

As always, if you try any of these intention-setting ideas for holistic health, I would love to hear about the impact they might have had for you.  Please send me an email at linda@sanctuary4compassion.com to share!