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5 Intention-setting Ideas to Support Powerful Emotions

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When the United States was born in 1776 during the signing of the Declaration of Independence, Pluto, the planet of rebirth and transformation, was located at 27 degrees Capricorn.  More recently, Pluto entered Capricorn, a sign that signifies money, dominance, power, authority and ambition in late 2008 and leaves Capricorn on January 21, 2024.  Pluto reached 27 degrees Capricorn on 02/22/2022 and will do so again on July 11th and December 28th this year.  As such, many astrologers consider this the U.S.’s personal Pluto return.  A planetary return is when a planet revisits the same exact place in the sky, which for Pluto occurs around every 248 years!

Pluto represents destruction and construction and works to tear down things that are no longer working.  Anything that is occurring during this time will be asking us to pay attention to what needs to be transformed within the US and beyond, creating upheavals in the current dynamics, such as the sexist, racism, classist, homophobic, ableism, anti-Semitism, transphobic systems put in place all those years ago.  Pluto in Capricorn has removed the blinders and allowed these ugly and painful truths to be seen and felt more acutely.  It has brought down people and corporations that have refused to grow and transform.  It destroys what is no longer working and constructs new evolutionary ways, shifting ideology into a space of growth.

So what does this all have to do with our powerful emotions?  Well, with Pluto in Capricorn, the energy is working to support the growth of the world and specifically the United States.  And when there is resistance to this growth and evolution, societal upheavals are expected.  And when we as humans experience such societal upheavals, powerful emotions tend to arise.  And if we don’t tend to these powerful emotions, conflict may escalate not only externally but perhaps more importantly, internally.

Below are intention-setting ideas for you to consider to ride the collective and personal emotional waves as Pluto continues to push us on our journey of transformation and evolution:

  1. Befriend Powerful Emotions. Don’t view your emotions as the enemy as so many of us have been taught.  Powerful emotions have information to share if we can simply welcome them, instead of reject them.  For example, consider anger.  Anger’s message is often that our needs are not being met, either because they are being ignored, invalidated, dismissed, or trampled on.  Anger might be saying “I need to be seen, heard, valued, supported and/or accepted!”  Perhaps think about the last time you felt anger (dare I say rage?) and get curious about what it is trying to say to you.  What need or core value was not being honored in that moment?  Gaining clarity around your needs, and how anger attempts to protect those needs, begins to soothe this powerful emotion as if feels heard and valued (by you!).
  2. Release Control!.  We have also been taught that we can control our emotions.  Unfortunately, this lesson has created a belief that leads many of us to disassociate, to cut off all connection between between our logical and emotional intelligence.  However, under such conditions, powerful emotions tend to show up when least expected or wanted, because they will only be ignored for awhile.  Perhaps think about how you might regulate or balance your emotions, not control them.  For example, when we experience loss, sadness is a normal, natural human response and requires expression.  If we repress it, thinking we can control it, it will shift into the space of depression.
  3. Accept ALL Emotions.  Powerful emotions are not bad, they are human. Another step in regulating or balancing emotions is to accept all of them and honor that they are what make us human.  Take guilt as an example.  Most of us don’t like feeling guilt as it is uncomfortable.  However, what if we accepted guilt as a guide, the primary emotion that keeps us connected to our authentic self.  Perhaps consider thinking of guilt as a guide, not viewing it as a punishment making us suffer for a mistake we made.  As humans, we make mistakes.  That is a necessary part of learning.  So, when we begin to veer too far away from our authentic self and behave in a way that elicits guilt, thank guilt for being the guard rails to our journey, instead of beating yourself up as you learn along the way.
  4. FACE Fear.  If we don’t embrace our deepest fear, it will always be in the driver seat of our lives.  This is not a conscious decision, but a reality.  Embracing our deepest fear doesn’t mean we are turning the steering wheel over to it.  Instead, it invites in compassion and encourages fear to loosen its grip on the wheel.  To FACE your biggest fear allows space for us to engage in a dialog with it and honor how it too protects us.  Consider trying the following:
    • Foster an internal and external environment where awareness, understanding and choice can grow.
    • Act even when experiencing fear, even in the smallest of ways, as action reduces fear and builds strength and resiliency.
    • Create a current vision that comforts and sooths fear, whether in your mind to visit or perhaps a drawing or picture to look at frequently.
    • Express a mantra that challenges the fear, perhaps “This fear might be real, but it is not true right now!”
  5. Give Shame Back.  Somewhere along our journey, usually when we were very young, we internalized a message that we were bad or inadequate in some way.  Shame believes it is being protective, keeping you from connecting to others in order to avoid further hurt and humiliation.  In actuality, it is keeping you from accepting yourself and connecting with your authentic being.  Shame needs to be given back to the person that gave it to you, is not yours to keep!  Shame is like a hot potato that if we don’t give it back, we continue to pass it around to others, to try and make ourselves feel better.  The shortest route to feeling better is to shine the light on shame, give it air to breath so it can die on the vine.  Shame is like toxic mold.  Once mold sees the light and feels the dry air, it withers and dies.  Shame is probably one of the most powerful emotions keeping us small, so perhaps consider seeking the support of a trusted friend or professional counselor to support you in shining the light on the roots of any shame you are carrying under Pluto’s return, so it can be destroyed once and for all.

As always, if you try any of these intention-setting ideas for holistic health, I would love to hear about the impact they might have had for you.  Please send me an email at linda@sanctuary4compassion.com to share!

5 Intention-setting Ideas to Build Courage This Spring

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The fear that this pandemic has created is palpable.  It is impacting all of us in some way.  It is tapping into our primal sense of survival and bringing up stuff we thought was resolved long ago, but was perhaps simply hidden from view.  Well as the days begin to grow longer, the light and warmth of the spring invite us to move through the darkness, face our fears and step into the light.

But how do we gather the courage to do so?

Below I provide intention-setting ideas on how to exercise our courage muscle (think your heart) in a healthy way to reduce the control fear has on your life, inviting in more confidence, joy and peace.  I hope you will consider trying one!

  1. Give fear a voice.  Remember when you were little and you were afraid that there were monsters under the bed or in the closet?  Well, they were scary because we couldn’t see them.  So, consider writing your fears down, giving them a name such as “failure”, “success”, “death”, “rejection”, “abandonment”, “vulnerability”, “dependence”, “emotions”, whatever it might be that stops you cold or wakes you up in the middle of the night.  Simply by identifying the fear with a name shines a light on it, taking it out of the dark and zapping it of some of its strength to hold you back from living your life more fully in the present moment.
  2. Observe fear.  When we can sit with our fear for a few minutes, get curious about it.  Perhaps pose one or more of the 5 Ws and H questions (Who, What, When, Where, Why and How) to this fear.  For example, perhaps ask it “Who gave you to me?, What do you want to tell me?, Where was I when I first remember recognizing you? Why might I need you? and/or How did you protect me in the past?”.  Fear is a normal, natural part of being a human and it does serve and protect.  It is when it leads our life that it hinders our ability to experience confidence and joy, which are also normal, natural parts of being human.  The more you are able to befriend your fear, again the less dominant it will be.
  3. Share.  Another powerful way to reduce the impact of fear is to share your fear with another person, whether it is a friend or an objective counselor.  By verbalizing your fear to another, you take back some of your power that it has taken from you because you now can call it out – it can no longer hide in the dark.  It reduces any shame that might be present from experiencing fear, because it challenges the belief that there must be something wrong with us if we have this fear.  Remember, fear is a normal, natural part of being human.
  4. Visualize.  Another tool to reduce the amount of power fear has in our lives is to visualize what it might look like to be fearless in the face of your fear.  To support your visualization efforts, consider creating a vision board that will contain images and words that challenge your fear, that reflect your inner courage and strength to face your fear.  Once created, remember to place your vision board somewhere you can see it everyday.  I keep mine by my vanity, so I see it each morning when brushing my teeth!
  5. Take action.  One of the most powerful antidotes to fear is acting in the face of fear, to slay the dragon so to speak.  Now the action does not need to be something big, a small step forward is enough to exercise the courage muscle, giving it new found strength to take another small step.  So, if you are not sure where to start, go back up to the intention-setting ideas above, and pick one to try out.  Our fears may not ever be completely extinguished, yet, when we can look deeply at them, we take back our power and fear will no longer run the show from the shadows.

As always, if you try any of these intention-setting ideas for holistic health, I would love to hear about the impact they might have had for you.  Please send me an email at linda@sanctuary4compassion.com to share!

Yoga helps improve mental health at any age!

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For my 40th birthday, I ventured to a spa in the Catskills of NY with a dear friend of mine for a long weekend to relax and celebrate this milestone in my life. Little did I know at the time how much this trip would change my life!

I decided to keep an open mind and try every class they offered along with the ‘vegetarian’ food being served while restricting my intake of salt, sugar, and caffeine. There were no TVs or radios in the rooms and it was before ‘smart phones’ so we were pretty cut off from the rest of the world, yet surrounded by so much of Mother Nature calling us to connect with her beauty.

Now as I reflect back, I find myself smiling because it felt so disorienting yet so comforting at the same time. I was at a point in my life where I spent a great deal of time at work, with very little time for me. I was most familiar with putting everyone else’s needs in front of mine, and believed that I could only ‘be done’ when everyone else was taken care of, which reinforced an unconscious belief that my value or worth came from taking care of others. I was exhausted emotionally, physically, mentally, and spiritually and didn’t even realize it! Little did my brain know how much my body craved to slow down and nurture it, instead of feeding it a constant diet of stress caused by a deep need to please others.

My mind-body connection was turned off until that weekend in NY. After trying the step-aerobics class (and creating a moat around my step from my own sweat), I found my way to my first ever yoga class. Immediately upon settling onto my mat, something shifted inside of me. I don’t necessarily remember the teacher or the poses, but I do remember FEELING and thinking that what I was experiencing seemed vaguely familiar yet foreign at the same time. When I left that class, I felt a sense of peace and somehow a bit lighter than when I walked into it, although it was NOT a power yoga class and I didn’t even break a sweat.

On the drive home from that weekend away, I was determined to find a local yoga class where I could test out if I could replicate the results of that one yoga class. I found a small one-room yoga studio one town over and when I walked in, I was amazed that it felt like ‘home’ and not any house I had ever lived in. The sense of peace and calm was palpable and irresistible. I found myself called back day after day for over two years. My felt experience in that yoga class in NY was not a one-time event!

Although initially I continued to work long hours, my addiction slowly shifted towards spending more time on my mat in those group yoga classes, where no one knew my name and no one expected anything from me. I could simply be in my own inner world while surrounded by others doing the same thing. The first specific learning I remember is that I was breathing incorrectly. I would hold my stomach in on my inhale and let my belly out on my exhale. No wonder my mind and body were in a constant battle! As I learned to synchronize my breath with the movement of my body, I was able to start to notice sensations in my body, be guided by them to avoid any physical pain, and begin to trust the emotional intelligence of my body.

And that was where I came face-to-face with my anxiety. It was in that safe, sacred space in those group yoga classes where I realized how my mind worked very hard to distract me from the wisdom – and pain – that my body held, encouraging me to keep moving in order to avoid the stillness, because it was in the stillness that the underlying fears would rear their ugly heads. And yet, what I discovered was that by inviting those fears to join me on my mat, sitting with them while I breathed deeply, and asking them how they came to be, I was able to gain a new appreciation for how my fears had been serving me. As my awareness and gratitude grew, my fears began to fade. Don’t get me wrong, my fears still exist, along side of a full palette of other powerful emotions, yet they no longer control me or constrict my world. When my fear greets me now, I remember that they are trying to communicate something to me, so I create time and space for them, honoring their protective nature.

That trip to NY was many years ago, before much of the clinical research to demonstrate the benefits of yoga was conducted, but my personal experience hooked me from that very first class. Now it seems new research is being published every month from around the world supporting the claims that yoga is not only a viable treatment for physical and mental health challenges but also a way to prevent illness by integrating it into a self-care program to promote overall well-being. So, if you don’t want to take my word for it – click on the link below to check out some recent research from Japan published in the International Journal of Yoga that suggests that yoga reduces anxiety, improving mental health, at any age!

Recent research from Japan