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5 Intention-setting Ideas to Fulfill the Universal Basic Human Need for Play

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In my experience, part of why adolescents struggle with the transition to adulthood is tied to the balance between work and play.  The cultural pressures to academically succeed to ensure future financial independence and stability doesn’t create a whole lot of space for play.  In addition, they watch their parents struggling to make time for self-care and play.  The future that they see doesn’t look too appealing and certainly not fun.  So, it’s no wonder that they might resist leaving their childhood behind.

Therefore, I think it is important for all of us to embrace that play is a universal human basic need, regardless of your biological age.  It is mission critical to create time and space for play as the balance it brings invites joy and peace into not only our lives, but the lives of those around us.

Therefore, below are some ideas for inviting more play into your life:

  1. Observe.   Children and animals innately know how to play.  So, consider taking some time to simply watch and learn.  You might notice their natural curiosity and/or how present they are in the moment.  You might also notice that children haven’t learned how to worry about what others think of them yet, so they might act silly.  So observing can help us to reconnect to that part of us that didn’t care what others thought of them and were so focused and curious that they allowed themselves to simply be silly!
  2. Play Journal.  When you notice yourself smiling and/or laughing, perhaps consider opening your journal and starting a “Play” section by writing it down.  Keep adding ideas as you observe others at play, especially any activities that remind you of when you played as a child that brought you joy.  Maybe it was dancing, playing cards or board games, and/or coloring or painting.
  3. Move.  The human body was designed to move.  Like the Tin Man in the Wizard of Oz, we will rust and stiffen if we don’t move.  Therefore, consider going outside to simply move.  It might be to take a walk or a run in the neighborhood, a hike on a nearby trail, a stroll at the beach or through a botanical garden, or it could be to participate in an ecstatic dance class.  Perhaps afterward, reflect on how moving your body shifted something in your mind and heart!
  4. Join In.  If you might be up for trying something new to feed our natural need for novelty, consider joining a local group.  Not sure where to start, try MeetUp for ideas.  Some options include rock climbing, museum visits, escape rooms, croquet, singing, knitting, meditation, quilting, yoga and so much more!
  5. Game Night. If you are more inclined to stay closer to home, consider organizing a neighborhood game night.  Perhaps bring up the idea of making game night a monthly activity, where each person gets to pick the game of their choice, so everyone has the opportunity to try something new.

5 Intention-setting Ideas for Raising Happy and Healthy Kids

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“It takes a village to raise a child.” ― African Proverb

Many of us may not have children or our children may already be grown, yet it doesn’t mean that we can forget about our parenting skills, because we never know when our “parent part” may be called upon to assist in raising happy and healthy kids.  And, if you are a furbaby parent, as I am, the following intention-setting ideas are appropriate for our four-legged kids too.

So, in honor of Purposeful Parenting Month, I thought it was critical in order to raise the vibration for all children – the “little one” inside all of us, the ones we may have the honor of raising directly now or in the future, and the ones that we may find ourselves interacting with in a less direct relationship – that we reflect on some ways that we can foster the development of trusting, loving, and healthy kids.  Below are some ideas for consideration:

  1. Set Boundaries.  It’s important to set rules and boundaries for our kids, whether two-legged or four-legged.  We all need to know how to behave in a respectful manner when interacting with others and it is up to us, the responsible adults, to model and teach our children what that means.  It is also important to be consistent once a boundary is set, otherwise, we will create confusion.  Children look to adults for protection and direction and setting healthy boundaries goes a long way toward making them feel safe and calm.
  2. Make Time for Play.  Play is a basic human need – no matter how old our bodies get!  Embracing this need allows us to prioritize fun in our lives and include our children.  Research has also shown that it is important to play with your animals if you want to improve their behavior.  Playing with children is not only good for them, but good for you as it allows you to stay connected with your own “inner child”, that part of you that wants to express its sense of creativity, stay true to your authentic self, and pursue goals with passion.
  3. Catch Them Doing Something You Like.  Positive reinforcement has been shown to be the most powerful motivator as it makes us feel good about ourselves and more connected with others.  Expressing appreciation and gratitude towards your children when you observe them doing something that brings you joy, especially when it is not expected or tied to achievement, can be especially powerful.  For example, simply thanking your child for sharing with or showing kindness to another person can plant a seed for similar behaviors in the future.  When it comes to our four-legged kids, a simple pat on the head when they sit down next you quietly or come to you when you call them, will create the connection that invites them to repeat such responses.
  4. Love Equally and Uniquely.  It is important to not show favoritism, even if you feel it at times.  So, recognizing that our children have different personalities and other qualities that will draw us towards and away from them at different times, find a unique way to express your love to each of your children that fits with them.  Then, set the intention to use those unique expressions of love at least once a day with each child.  This guidance can also be applied to our furbabies.  Maybe one four-legged is a “morning” or “sunshine” baby while the other is a “nighttime” or “moonshine” baby, so you can plan to spend time with them when they most need it.
  5. Make Eye Contact.  Providing  our little ones – both human and furry – with a loving gaze produces a biochemical response that strengthens the connection, or bond between you and them. The level of the hormone oxytocin has been shown to increase in both humans and dogs after spending time looking into each other’s eyes.  Oxytocin is also known as the bonding or cuddling hormone and is sometimes referred to as the love drug. It is associated with trust and that warm, fuzzy feeling when you are close to another.  So, if you want to give yourself a boost of love or a sense of connection, slow down and LOOK to make eye contact with your children!